Along with amphetamines and opiates, hallucinogens offer a world of whack-ass experiences for the typical college student. Unlike crack or heroin, this will only SORT OF destroy your life and give you flashbacks that’ll really fuck you up when you need to be doing something grown up, like witnessing the birth of your first child or driving.
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“Time Warner Cable, this is Erin speaking, please hold,” I say.
“Oh, I just wanted—”
“Please hold,” I say again, despite the woman’s exasperated tone. For the good of mankind, she’s going to have to wait.
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