Batman by Other Directors


With superhero movies being rebooted faster and faster these days, it seems like only a matter of time before every director in Hollywood gets a chance to do their own ‘Batman' movie. Nolan and Burton have had their turn, but here’s what Batman might look like in the hands of several other preeminent directors.


Woody Allen

Jason Biggs stars as Lenny Bateman, a nebbishy freelance writer who vows vengeance after his manuscript is rejected by the head of a publishing company, "a real joker.”


Steven Spielberg

This soaring, big-budget masterpiece follows a creature named B.M. (the Bat Man) as he travels from his home planet to befriend a small boy named Robin. Everything is fine … until the dinosaurs show up.


David Lynch

Detective Bruce Wayne has a jazzy nightmare about a man with green hair. 


Wes Anderson 

A wealthy heir dons plastic bat ears and embarks on a whimsical, wry adventure with his elderly Indian houseman, Alfred. Luke and Owen Wilson star as the separate halves of Two-Face.    


Spike Lee

It's the hottest summer in Gotham City history, and racial tensions run high between that cracker-ass Commissioner Gordon and local justice-delivery boy, Brucie Dubs.


Frank Capra 

When the Christmas deposit goes missing from Gotham Savings & Loan, a gangly young Batman tells the residents, "Your money's not here, it's in Bane's house, and Penguin's house ... and Poison Ivy's house!" 


Mel Brooks

This daffy romp stars Eugene Wilder as the "Bat-Mensch,” a lovable drunk who inherits a spooky cave. Dom DeLuise earns big laffs as campy, child-molesting villain "The Diddler.”


Richard Linklater

Bruce Wayne’s parents are shot over a period of 12 years. 


Michael Bay

The Batmobile transforms into a giant robot and ejaculates CGI bats all over Megan Fox. 


Illustration by Kevin Alvir